recently, God has been teaching me about preparedness. and my heart has been in a nearly constant state of preparation. and in this, i've learned that preparation means a constant move towards hope. and hope...that stuff...it's what God sends to sustain.
first...the physical manner...i changed my phone settings this past week. one of the moms i talked to said that she received her phone call at 1 a.m. (since there's a 12 hour time difference between here and taiwan). well, i always put my phone settings on silent at night because my sister lives in africa and she normally texts and posts her pictures while i'm sleeping. hearing that our call may come after we have fallen asleep, though, changed my thinking. so i fixed the settings on my phone so that texts were silent at night, but my ringer isn't and i leave my phone on now...ready at all times for a call to come. whenever that may be.
then, i've been moving and painting. jacob and i spent one entire snowy weekend a couple weeks ago building a massive wall unit. from scratch. to be honest, i didn't know we had that kind of capability within us. ha. here's some before/during after pictures below. we found a $3 bucket of discard paint at lowes, and then bought the wood...oh that's hilarious...wait you gotta see that picture first. here's how we got our 16' boards back to the house! :)
so then we built this thing. and this is our new office/guest room...until another house becomes available post baby. we are ready to move, i think, but don't feel the timing is right and don't want to redo parts of our home study at this time. so we are making what we have work for now.
so once the office was done...i painted the nursery. white. it had been gray and i love that color as well...but we found a full bucket of white and i spent this last weekend painting the room white. jacob worked comicon all weekend and so it was me, worship music, and a paint brush. and that's when i learned the most about hope and how preparation plays into that.
it's odd to me. to be preparing for a child i do not know. but i love them. though i do not fully know them, i love him/her. i know it may seem silly to some to be getting a room ready when we know so little about what our future timeline looks like. and our coming busy season aside, my heart needs this state of preparation. preparing mentally to be a mom. setting my heart towards that. and as i painted, hope came. i was assembling a room that i knew my baby would sleep in. new white paint covered the walls and i prayed for our birth parents. for them to be encouraged. for God to draw near to them and give them peace. i prayed for the orphanage and it's stability and perseverance in the government changes. i aligned my heart into hope.
and in that. God is working on my heart. preparing it for Him. because in the same manner, he can return at any time. in a time i least expect.
my senses were heightened a week or two ago for some reason and i wanted to make sure my phone was on me at all times. like. all times. and that week, when i was most concerned about getting a call, i lost my phone at least twice. like once in the snow in the post office parking lot...luckily someone else found it...but i was thinking "seriously? this is when i'm being most particular about holding onto it and i can't keep track of it"...and God nudged me. is our heart in a place like that with Him? are we so concerned with doing things for him and accomplishing the "things" we feel like will make us spiritual that we lose sight of Him and the real preparation? that was when the whole prepared state really began rolling around in my head....and it's been guiding my thoughts ever since.
i want to be preparing my heart for christ's return in the same way that i am preparing for my child. wrapping my head around eternity as i wrap around becoming a mother. cleaning house and cleaning out my home, as well as my heart of whatever distractions hold it back. being in a state of humbleness and forgiveness before him, as i'm reminded when i painted the walls white as snow in the new room. and in doing so...we are cultivating a heart of hope.
i know i'm months away from meeting my child. but the call could come at any time. but as i get ready for their time, hope builds. and what is my relationship in Christ without hope. and i know that feasibly Christ's return could be months/years away...but realistically it could be tonight. so whatever it is you are preparing for in life, consider if your zest in which you are working towards that matches the zeal in which you are pursuing your relationship with God...and are those steps you are making towards Him wrapped up in "things" and "activities" or do they revolve around a personal, relational experience with His presence.
and then...to wrap this all up, a friend sent me this scripture yesterday that tied it all together so well. the first half just related to so many other things right now and the second verse just fit so perfectly with this...1 Peter 1:7-8 "These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith -- of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire -- may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filed with an inexpressible and glorious joy...."
today i prepare. and in my preparations, i draw near and build hope.
first...the physical manner...i changed my phone settings this past week. one of the moms i talked to said that she received her phone call at 1 a.m. (since there's a 12 hour time difference between here and taiwan). well, i always put my phone settings on silent at night because my sister lives in africa and she normally texts and posts her pictures while i'm sleeping. hearing that our call may come after we have fallen asleep, though, changed my thinking. so i fixed the settings on my phone so that texts were silent at night, but my ringer isn't and i leave my phone on now...ready at all times for a call to come. whenever that may be.
then, i've been moving and painting. jacob and i spent one entire snowy weekend a couple weeks ago building a massive wall unit. from scratch. to be honest, i didn't know we had that kind of capability within us. ha. here's some before/during after pictures below. we found a $3 bucket of discard paint at lowes, and then bought the wood...oh that's hilarious...wait you gotta see that picture first. here's how we got our 16' boards back to the house! :)
(this was also about the time that he asked me kindly to stop photographing the spectacle and help him tie it down lol)
so then we built this thing. and this is our new office/guest room...until another house becomes available post baby. we are ready to move, i think, but don't feel the timing is right and don't want to redo parts of our home study at this time. so we are making what we have work for now.
so once the office was done...i painted the nursery. white. it had been gray and i love that color as well...but we found a full bucket of white and i spent this last weekend painting the room white. jacob worked comicon all weekend and so it was me, worship music, and a paint brush. and that's when i learned the most about hope and how preparation plays into that.
it's odd to me. to be preparing for a child i do not know. but i love them. though i do not fully know them, i love him/her. i know it may seem silly to some to be getting a room ready when we know so little about what our future timeline looks like. and our coming busy season aside, my heart needs this state of preparation. preparing mentally to be a mom. setting my heart towards that. and as i painted, hope came. i was assembling a room that i knew my baby would sleep in. new white paint covered the walls and i prayed for our birth parents. for them to be encouraged. for God to draw near to them and give them peace. i prayed for the orphanage and it's stability and perseverance in the government changes. i aligned my heart into hope.
and in that. God is working on my heart. preparing it for Him. because in the same manner, he can return at any time. in a time i least expect.
my senses were heightened a week or two ago for some reason and i wanted to make sure my phone was on me at all times. like. all times. and that week, when i was most concerned about getting a call, i lost my phone at least twice. like once in the snow in the post office parking lot...luckily someone else found it...but i was thinking "seriously? this is when i'm being most particular about holding onto it and i can't keep track of it"...and God nudged me. is our heart in a place like that with Him? are we so concerned with doing things for him and accomplishing the "things" we feel like will make us spiritual that we lose sight of Him and the real preparation? that was when the whole prepared state really began rolling around in my head....and it's been guiding my thoughts ever since.
i want to be preparing my heart for christ's return in the same way that i am preparing for my child. wrapping my head around eternity as i wrap around becoming a mother. cleaning house and cleaning out my home, as well as my heart of whatever distractions hold it back. being in a state of humbleness and forgiveness before him, as i'm reminded when i painted the walls white as snow in the new room. and in doing so...we are cultivating a heart of hope.
i know i'm months away from meeting my child. but the call could come at any time. but as i get ready for their time, hope builds. and what is my relationship in Christ without hope. and i know that feasibly Christ's return could be months/years away...but realistically it could be tonight. so whatever it is you are preparing for in life, consider if your zest in which you are working towards that matches the zeal in which you are pursuing your relationship with God...and are those steps you are making towards Him wrapped up in "things" and "activities" or do they revolve around a personal, relational experience with His presence.
and then...to wrap this all up, a friend sent me this scripture yesterday that tied it all together so well. the first half just related to so many other things right now and the second verse just fit so perfectly with this...1 Peter 1:7-8 "These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith -- of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire -- may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filed with an inexpressible and glorious joy...."
today i prepare. and in my preparations, i draw near and build hope.
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